Sunday Shortcuts

When Don Old Toadfartz was in the White House as 45, he was untested and largely unknown, other than as a TV reality show performer. When he returns as 47, he won't have the advantage of still being an unknown commodity, and the stunts he relied on then won't work now.

Demented Don Old Toadfartz was found guilty on 34 felony charges in the Stormy Daniels hush-money case, and will be discharged unconditionally, meaning no prison time. The old fool wants the American people to pity him, proving he's crazier than a shithouse rat.

Sick Saturday Stuff

Demented Don Old Toadfartz should be in hell where he belongs, but instead he's using his political celebrity status to hawk those cheesy fake bibles he personally endorsed a few months ago. The lazy slob can always find ways to separate goobers from their money, and peddling the Lee Greenwood version of the bible might help him escape hell and open the gates for him at the other place (or so he hopes).

The New Nightmare Continues (Metaphors)

One of the most famous scenes in classic literature is found in the Charles Dickens novel Oliver Twist. In the book, Oliver is a pauper boy residing in the parish work house. In the familiar scene, he has finished his allowed serving of thin gruel, but still hungry, he approaches the master and says, "Please sir, I want some more."

The result of the recent election reminded me of Oliver Twist and his behavior, and Oliver is a suitable metaphor for the pitiful dipshits whose appetite for ignorance, laziness, corruption and total incompetence remained unsatisfied (gruel being an appropriate metaphor for Demented Dookie Donhole's complete failure at first term leadership). The dipshits held out their bowls, and said "Please, sir, we want some more."

Update 11:30 PM Monday 12/09/24: One of many things we Americans need and deserve to have: Demented Dookie Donhole and Elon Muskrat, both of whom are mental cases, destroy each other. 

Dookie Donhole and E. Muskrat are both semi-psychotic narcissists, and there's not room for both of them in the top slot of the MAGA hierarchy.  

Dookie Donhole has obviously convinced himself that packing his administration with unqualified assholes who are willing to obey any order he gives them will allow him to throw out any parts of the U.S. Constitution that annoy him (e.g. the 14th amendment), and punish as criminals everyone who opposes him (e.g. Liz Cheney, Adam Schiff).  

We should start thinking about what's ahead of us as RULE BY CESSPOOL, since the executive branch will just be another deep hole full of turds.

Week Four of the New Nightmare (Extra)

Demented Dookie Donhole has had his butt kicked by the president of Mexico, so now he's declaring the immigration threat on our southern border has been eliminated. Every time a competent national leader flips him off, he pretends he got what he wanted instead of another ass-whipping.

There are reports that Demented Dookie Donhole has plans to seize total control of the federal budget from Congress. Traditional Republicans (non-MAGA) will soon need to work out their own plan for preserving and protecting their authority as established in the U.S. Constitution. Their plan will probably need to include Congressional Democrats (and there are lots of them). 

Seriously, are these elected officials really willing to tremble in the shadows and allow one of the three worst people in the world and his team of Project 2025 lunatics to gradually turn USA into the most terrible shithole on earth?

Week Four of the New Nightmare

The Demented Dookie Donhole is hopelessly ignorant when it comes to understanding everything he needs to understand about the government of the United States to function as POTUS at even the lowest acceptable level of competence.

On the other hand, he thinks he knows all there is to know about TV reality shows, so he's opted to be a TV reality show superstar instead of a viable POTUS, and he's choosing people for positions in the executive branch based mostly on how they perform on television.

Now that the 2024 election is in the books, it's time to report the updated BNSR (Basic National Stupidity Rate), which has been recently modified. The best current BNSR measurement is simply the percentage of the total popular vote won by Donhole the Asshole in the most recent presidential election.

According to the Associated Press as of today, the total 2024 popular vote was 153,737,131 votes, and the waste of shit won 76,842,134 of them (49.98 percent). The previous BNSR was calculated somewhat differently (Republican average over all elections since 2020), and the previous BNSR was only 47.364 percent. Now that The Donhole has nearly absolute control of the former Republican Party, national stupidity has increased by about 2.6%.

The Basic Stupidity Rate (BSR) in Texas is fairly high at 56.3%, but Texans look smart compared to dipshits in red states like Oklahoma (BSR 66.2%), Alabama (BSR 64.8%), and Mississippi (BSR 61.6%).

Tulsi Gabbard has a deserved reputation as a Russian asset, so it's predictable that Donhole the Asshole wants her to lead America's national intelligence services, and congressional MAGA Monkeys are supporting him, while some Senate (R)s are leery.

More fun with numbers? As of 2023, the population of the United States was 334.9 million people, so we now realize that 22.94 percent of the American people voted for the waste of shit and ruined the lives of 77.06 percent who didn't vote for the motherfucker.

Week Three of the New Nightmare

This will be a quick summary of the main things being reported on the liberal alternate media websites.

Future Senator Adam Schiff, someone who knows all about the Big Fat Pussy (BFP) and refuses to fear him, says those asinine nominees like Gaetz, Gabbard, and RFK Jr. are just the BFP testing the limits of his ability to boss Congress around like he bossed people around on his TV reality show years ago. He wants to find out how far he can push the House and Senate before he actually becomes the 47th Pussydent next year. If the traditional Republicans in Congress team up with the Democrats to get him under control, he'll collapse like the weakling he is in real life.

Elon Muskrat, another scum-sucking pig orbiting around the BFP, is moving toward becoming the co-precedent (sic), and the BFP isn't prepared to share the national media spotlight with anyone, especially someone who makes him appear to be incapable of leadership (like Muskrat).

Military officers to be court-martialed for treason because they followed HIS plan in Afghanistan? Someone needs to knock the BFP down and stand on his throat. A few weeks ago, after Kamala Harris began moving ahead of him in the election polls, the BFP started whining and denying virtually every insane thing he had promised to do as soon as he took office. He insisted he'd never heard of Project 2025 or any of the people who prepared it.

The traditional Republicans who are still holding seats in Congress will soon be forced to prove their patriotism since every goddamned thing BFP is currently threatening to do will hasten the destruction of the USA as a world leader. They can prevent that, but will they?

As my dad used to say, Sen. Tim Scott ain't got the brains god gave a piss-ant.

Week 2 of The New Nightmare

Another interesting article @ AlterNet discusses all those promises (threats) that Wasted Shit made during his four-year campaign for another term as Pussydent (sic), and what the real life results might be if the damned fool actually follows through.

Suggestion: Fuck Rick Scott and go with Thune or Cornyn for Senate leadership. Eventually, those goddamn MAGA Morons need to be fenced in so they can't keep ruining America for the decent Americans who outnumber them. Republicans in Congress need to stand tall and steer clear of the MAGA quicksand. Wasted Shit needs to be shown that he will not dictate terms to them, now or ever. His status as a lame duck begins next February.

Wasted Shit isn't even the pussydent (yet) and he's already pretending to be Vladimir Putin's peer, instead of being Putin's butt boy, his true status among world leaders.