The art of the squeal

Kos: Donnie Caca isn't a real president, and he's not even a real politician. He's a TV reality show performer pretending to be both of those things for cable news programs. The only reason he's in the top job is that nearly half of American voters are even more useless than he is.

More from Kos: Donnie, the Russians, and the NRA are intermingling and Mueller is asking questions. More fertile ground.

From TPM: Remember Donnie's inauguration and what a marvelous bash it was? Maybe we can add it to a growing shit list of Donnie's impeachable offenses.

Needs a LOT more goo

His Followers

By now, there can be no disagreement among reasonable people: Those trumpies are completely ate up with a bad case of the dumbass.

More from Wonkette: White supremacists are living proof there's no such thing as white supremacy.

Membership in the club is not limited to people who are unbelievably gullible, but nearly every one of them is anyway.

Yeah, they're mostly gullible dumbasses, but the guy they're following ain't no genius either.

The next flight to Moscow departs in an hour. Be on it.

 

Amateur Hour

Donnie Wet Fart lives in the confined world of reality TV shows, which is why an oily shyster like Joe diGenova slid over from Fox News to Donnie's legal team this week. I expect Robert Mueller is trembling with fear over this dramatic plot twist.

Updated 12:06 PM Saturday 24 March: In Donnie's mind, he's playing the greatest president in American history on the highest-rated TV reality show ever. The cast members playing his cabinet are supposed to gaze at him adoringly, praise his courage and the brilliance of his decisions, and treat the chance to serve him as a blessing from god. Donnie's even staged some cabinet meetings strictly for the TV audience viewing at home.

Now we're just waiting to see what happens when Fantasy World has a head-on collision with Brutal Reality.

Update 11:21 AM Sunday: In Fantasy World, all the best attorneys are itching for the opportunity to join Donnie Wet Fart's crack legal team, and make eleventy millions of dollars too.

Who?

By the time Robert Mueller completes his work, the members of the 10K fan club will believe Donnie never knew or worked with anybody, and the only people involved in his 2016 campaign were strangers who wandered in off the street and disappeared the next day without leaving a forwarding address.

Donnie 10K is lucky that one-third of the American people are the dumbest goddamned human beings on the planet.

Donnie 10K is the loneliest fat guy in America.

That's bad.

How bad is it? Here's how bad it is: Donnie Two Scoops, the stupidest person ever called President of the United States, knows he can use Republican voters because they're stupid, according to Jared Kushner.

How stupid are people who can be exploited by someone as stupid as Donnie Two Scoops? It gives me headaches to think about it.

Making America great on a windy day

Ignorant x 1,000,000

It's known as the Dunning-Kruger effect, and it explains a lot about Don Cornholio and the pathetic losers who believe everything he tells them.

Borderline Crazy

Am I the only one who thinks these goddamned militia fucks need to grow up and get jobs?

Sweet Home Alabama

Another thing that's completely predictable: Any gathering of Republican legislators anywhere will eventually waste time passing ridiculous symbolic gestures. It causes me to wonder why they do that. The most likely explanation is that the people who vote for Republican legislators are mostly ignorant yahoos who are impressed by meaningless symbolic gestures. I've also noticed this activity occurs most often in backwater hellholes like Alabama and Arkansas.

Like mama

At last, the definitive judgment has been rendered. Obama says he's changed his views on gay marriage, and naturally one of the Palin clan felt compelled to weigh in. The urge to share backwater conservative viewpoints must be a genetic trait in that family.

God's message system

According to the foaming-at-the-mouth religious nuts among us, every time something bad happens it's God telling us he's angry about something we're doing. To Fred Phelps and the Westboro (Kansas) Baptist Church, God is punishing America for tolerating homosexuals by killing soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan. Now, the poster girl for the evangelunical tea people is letting us know that God uses the weather to tell us He wants the Republican budget cuts adopted PDQ.

This summer, living in Texas has been like living in Hell. If this is God sending another message, I'd prefer a simple e-mail instead.

Still here

It's May 22nd, nearly May 23rd, and I'm still here. The Rapture and related life-changing events didn't happen. I'm not surprised, but those fucking losers who gave away all their possessions and emptied out their bank accounts are into some DEEP rationalization tonight. Meanwhile, the old saying about the parting of fools and their money is again proven true.

Poll News

I was looking through the local newspaper and came across an article that referred to a recent poll which found that 24 percent of Americans think Obama is Muslim. This is consistent with my personal polls which usually find that one out of four Americans is an ignorant fuck.

The article says that 47 percent think Obama's a Christian, and 24 percent don't know. To those, you can add one guy in Texas who doesn't give a shit one way or the other.

More people have decided Obama's a Muslim since the NYC mosque furor became an news item. A lot of Republicans switched their vote from Christian to Muslim. Imagine that.

I suppose that as soon as the GOP regains control of the House, some teabagger will introduce a motion to impeach Obama because he lied about his religious preference. Why not ? They'll need something to pass the time.

Will and Bachmann, sittin' in a tree...

George Will is almost always unreadable since he relies so heavily on pretentious, stylized prose, but for a conservative, he tends to be almost tolerable in small doses. Therefore, it can be considered a minor disappointment that he wrote this crap regarding Michele Bachmann, who's pretty much in the Sarah Palin class when it comes to Republicans too freakish to ignore.

And while we're on the subject of conservative columns on the Chronicle editorial page, there's this horseshit from Charles Krauthammer, who's as unreadable as Will and carries the added burden of being intolerable at all times. Since he's a regular on Fox News, it isn't surprising he's taking up for them. The administration needs to say to hell with it and keep on freezing FNC out.

Sign of The Birther

The Louisiana congressman who delivered the Republican response to Obama's speech last night is a birther, so for me, the fucker has no credibility on anything.

The picture, another less prominent birther, was swiped from DU.

Aggie Jokes

Sometimes it seems like Texas A&M is bound and determined to be a small-time operation. When political hacks like Rick Perry and Mike McKinney start fooling around with things, the end results are sure to be trouble and that seems to be where things are headed.

And then there's this little item. Here's my current thinking: Governor Kay Bay might not be a stroll in the park, but by God, she'd be a major improvement over Ricardo.

Added 6:04 pm Sunday, June 14th: So help me, if it turns out this resignation is in any way a consequence of shady, behind-the-scenes intrigue by Ricardo and his lapdog, Mike McKinney, I'm throwing up my hands and writing TAMU off as a lost cause.

Little Dick Cheney tells it like it isn't.

Some people should learn to just STFU. Richard Cheney, notable for his success in dodging the draft in the Vietnam era, would do the world a favor if he crawled back under his rock and stayed there until he deteriorated back into the soil. Of all the Republican lowlifes on the face of the earth, suckbuddies Rush and Little Dick dominate the list. And while I'm on the subject, neither of those vermin will ever get near the level of stature that Colin Powell can achieve on his worst day, blindfolded.

Flashback

When it comes to people who fell into buckets of shit and came up with roses in their teeth, the subject of this article may be at the top of the list. In all the excitement since last November, I almost forgot about the Wasilla Wondermom and Joe the Dumber Plumber. I'll have to stop ridiculing Joe because while I was nodding off, he's apparently become a constitutional scholar, political analyst, and theologian, with answers to complex questions of the day. It must be true because he's now being interviewed by important religious publications so his learned views can be spread all over the internet like fertilizer spread upon a pasture.

I came across this bilge courtesy of a link at the Dallas News editorial page, where the article was classified as a MUST-READ online opinion piece. Jeeeeez.

Closing question from the interview was if Joe had plans to run for elected office. Here's the response:

Not right now. God hasn't said, "Joe, I want you to run." I feel more important to just encourage people to get involved, one way or another. If I can inspire some leaders, that would be great. I don't know if I want to be a leader.

Maybe someday God will say, "Joe, give up this bullshit and get back to trying to be the very best plumber you can be. That's all I need from you."

That would fall into the category of A Blessing from God, assuming Joe listened to Him.