It's nice to be needed. In yesterday's mail, there was another warm, personal letter from my old friend, RNC chairman Michael Steele, or Mickey as I like to call him when we're having beers. Mickey appreciates my opinions so much that he sent me still another questionnaire, this one called the 2010 Obama Agenda Survey. Mickey's letter said that my opinions, and those of the other people who fill out the survey, will be used to overcome the "non-stop, swooning coverage" of Obama's agenda by the "ultra-biased" news media. Mickey and the RNC need me to act quickly to keep the Democrats from carrying their momentum into the midterm elections. As he said in the letter, "It is up to you and me to stop them." Mickey always has my back.
Knowing the Republicans are counting on me, I filled out the questionnaire. Based on my answers, I support Obama's plans to raise taxes, give amnesty to illegal immigrants, bankrupt Social Security, nationalize health care, stifle the national economy, and create massive new government bureaucracies. I didn't write Mickey a check for 500 bucks to help the GOP "rebuild from the grassroots up, and come back with renewed energy and a strong commitment to conservative principles of low taxes, small government, personal responsibility, and a strong national defense."
My question to Mickey is, "What part of 'go fuck yourself' do you not understand ? "
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